Circles

Rip van Winkle awake at last
cobwebs cleared
eyes straining against the harsh light of reality
crops withered
fields left to rot
by those tasked with tending
those I trusted
 
Emotions once a glacier, now like Armageddon's asteroid
the tidal wave sweeps me up
buries me deep beneath the waves
dapples of sunlight ripple above
Whispers of untrue companions stinging my ears
making it difficult to know which way is up
Swimming nonetheless.
Portions of my life flood my eyes
Lead to confusion, makes me swim harder
Circles
 
Impossible not to feel the pressure awareness brings
My heart simmers with just-now-accepted-as-real slights and neglect
by those I struggled to shield
from the judgement their actions demand
 
Acceptable no longer
How dare they
 
Rebuild my perspective, calibrate my actions
Love those who have harmed me
But withdraw
 
Stop wasting effort
on those unworthy
Be myself and enjoy
sharing that with those who appreciate it
 
Sickened by the fear of others
that twists their actions
to hurt themselves
to hurt me
 
Like radiation to my loving, open heart, poison
not welcome.
Help and run
Love from afar

No interest in being safe
Tired of being sorry
So tired

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Thank you for checking out my poem.  Something I wrote last night after a very difficult day.  If you are a fan of llamas, you may want to check out my previous post.  So kind of you to take time from your busy days and spend it here at Bright and Lovely.  You guys are wonderful!