Man I'm Whack, Me!

Today has been one of those too-quiet days where I start to really doubt I will ever have that serious, wonderful, loving relationship I have been looking forward to.

I just can't muster up the energy/gumption/courage to jump back into the dating pool so far.  As my last blog noted, I have had really crappy luck in that area, some of which has left scars that run deeper than I realized at first.

Today I texted Amy1 about going to the movies this afternoon for the 3'ish show and received no response.  Around 3'ish I get a text back that she forgot about it, that the time got away from her and wanted to know what I was doing.  I wrote her that I was computing and that was the last I heard from her.  Keep in mind, this was the second time I had tried to set this up with her.  Being forgotten, which should not come as a surprise to me anymore, was bothersome but I just feel like I am working too hard at something that is just a frienship.  I have to make all the plans and chase her around to get her to actually do anything.  And its always last minute.

So I decided to drive an hour to an old, cool movie theater out in the country to see MIB III which was very well-made, touching and funny.  Big thumbs up.  On the way I called Amy2 to see what she was up to.  Left a message and nothing back.

I cannot possibly imagine why my self confidence is on the ropes with all my super supportive, caring, dedicated friends taking care of me.  After a really long, busy, exhausting week (during which I also had to endure some really crappy friendship) I think I am appreciating my alone time more and more.

Sound so bitter because I am.  Feeling rejected, unloved, unnoticed and unimportant to people I care about.

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Man I'm Whack, Me!

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Oleh Unknown

Unknown 9:31 PM 3 comment